UPDATE: This article was published a week before the iPhone 13 was released. It’s now been updated with iPhone 13 specs and features.

iPhone 13 Pro & Pro Max

iPhone 13
  • A15 Bionic
  • 20% smaller notch
  • 1200 nits XDR display
  • 120Hz ProMotion display
  • 6.1” and 6.7” Pro and Pro Max
  • New stainless steel colors
  • New triple cameras + macros from the ultrawide
  • 4K 30fps ProRes video
  • Bumped battery life 13

iPhone 13 Pro: $999
iPhone 13 Pro Max: $1099

iPhone 13 & 13 Mini

  • A15 Bionic
  • New colors
  • 800 nits XDR display
  • 20% smaller notch
  • New camera array
  • Cinematic video mode
  • Slightly bumped battery life

iPhone 13 Mini: $699
iPhone 13: $799

Should I upgrade to iPhone 13? What kinda question is that? But it’s on everyone’s mind.

As the iPhone 13 looms larger with mid-September inching closer, your brain and wallet may be getting ready for a rumble in the jungle on whether to save that last $1000 bucks to pay the bills or be smart and fund Tim Cook’s next paycheck. 

It may be a huge dilemma, but I’m going to make it super easy for you to decide. 

It largely depends on which phone you’re currently using and your desperation to show the world how rich you are. So if we cut the decision down to these two factors, you’ll already have the answer to the question. 

But for those sticking around, I’ll allow the elephant in the room to trample our tiny hopes of evading this year’s iPhone. 

For iPhone Users:

If you are using the…

iPhone (1st Generation): I mean… there isn’t much to say, so *sigh* Yes

iPhone 3G: Please. Yes. 

iPhone 3Gs: It sure was a banger, but YES. 

iPhone 4: It was and will always be one of the most beautiful smartphones ever, but stop living in the past. Get the iPhone 13. Please. 

iPhone 4S: I admire the loyalty, but you need a reality check. iPhone 13 can be that reality check.

iPhone 5: Upgrade, you filthy caveperson. 

iPhone 5s: I’d keep it for that Touch ID nostalgia, but for the love of all things that are good and useful, get the iPhone 13. 

iPhone 6: Yes. 

iPhone 6S: You’re barely surviving, but the oxygen is running out quickly. Don’t be cheap and sell that kidney to fund the iPhone 13. (Please ignore the kidney advice)

Okay, but seriously…

Now we’re stepping in murky waters. The iPhone, with its build quality and years of software support, stands on the sands of time like it’s concrete, so starting with the iPhone 7, you need to start using your brain. 

iPhone 7 & 7 Plus: They’re old, but those things still get the job done. How, I don’t know. But they’re old, nevertheless, and you need something younger and faster to stay in tune with your dreams. Get the iPhone 13.

iPhone 8 & 8 Plus: If all you do is text and occasionally Snapchat your friends and watch YouTube, you’re good. iPhone 8 is pretty capable, but if you’re looking for solid performance, start begging your mum for the iPhone 13. 

iPhone X: Get the iPhone 13. You’re in the big league now, and the original notched iPhone won’t cut it. Not to say that iPhone X isn’t usable because hot damn it is, but considering you chose this over the 8 at launch, you’re definitely going to need the iPhone 13 to keep up with the Kardashians.

iPhone Xs & Xs Max: You don’t necessarily need the iPhone 13 because these are still seriously capable iPhones. But you can consider the latest if your wallet is impatient.

iPhone XR & SE 2: These two iPhones sit snugly between good and great. Usually, people who don’t care much about the ultimate performance carry the XR and SE. If you’re that person, you’re still good for another year, and the only reason you should upgrade is if the iPhone 13 is absolutely irresistible.

iPhone 11 & 11 Pro & Pro Max: Now, here’s a solid smartphone that will last you at least 2 more years like a champ. You do NOT need an upgrade. But you may WANT one if your willpower is as weak as my jokes. 

iPhone 12 & 12 Pro & Pro Max: How dare you mock us poor ones by even considering an upgrade? What? Are you going to keep the iPhone 12 as a spare? It’s because of people like you that Apple is worth Trillions, and I’m worth zerollians. See, you don’t need to upgrade. But then that mountain-like ego of yours can’t possibly imagine carrying the ancient iPhone 12 Pro Max that came out LAST YEAR, right? You probably won’t be able to bear the pity looks on your aged iPhone, so you’ll probably get the iPhone 13 anyway, so is there even any point in arguing here? 

For Android Users: 

Switch. Switch right away, and don’t ever look back. Get the iPhone 13.*

*this is supposed to be taken as a joke. I’ve had plenty of great Android phones that I’ve probably used for at least 2 to 3 days before returning them and getting back to the iPhone. That should be testament to the fact that Android phones are great till you get your sense of taste back.

Did you read my denser-than-rain-clouds review of the M1 MacBook Pro? Shame on you. Read it here: Apple M1 MacBook Pro Review: In-Depth Look & Guide [Updated September 2021]



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